THE BULLSHITTER

So I might be moving to Seattle when I graduate.....alright, enough about me, let's talk about you....and your thoughts.....and what makes you tick....and what stops you from ticking....and what makes that ticking sound......and why it makes a ticking sound.......and why I want to know why it makes a ticking sound......and why sound exsists.....and BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

When did somebody decide that life needed to be so fucking complicated?  Who decided that we need to think about the complexity of our thoughts.....and ruled out the option of just living life to the fullest with the ones we love.........and not having them analyze us for who we are.  I just want to smash in my toenails because of how complex some of the people out there are trying to make my laid-back, careless lifestyle.  It's not my place to worry about all of the small insignificants.  Life will work itself out.  But no, that's not good enough for some........we must worry ourselves sick about things that are not even REMOTELY in our control, causing us to have negative dillusions about how horrible our lives our.  It makes me sick.......I just barfed....that's because it made me sick.......like I just said it did at the beginning of this run-on sentence that is still running on for reasons that don't delve beyond the fact that i'm trying to prooooooooove a point about run-on sentences.

I don't care if life is tough.  That's life, work with it.  I don't care if you are stressed out....because you don't need to be stressed out.  Stress is a personal choice.  You can either roll with the punches.........or do the opposite and lean into the punches......while also punching yourself in the face.  I haven't met a woman who shares my view on life yet.......I came close, but it turned out she was sort of bluffing.  Except it was more of a four month bluff.  My lifestyle and choices have had little negative impact on my outcome besides an occasional missed class because of a hangover.  If you don't like how I tend my business, look in another direction but don't shove your big nosey nose into my shit and expect me to give one hot damn about why eating the salad instead of the fries will prolong my existence.  My family has a history of cancer, alzheimers,  and alcoholism.  If i'm lucky, I will die before I am taken by all three.  So in light of my situation, I have decided to take a bold new approach.  I live to where my goal is that cancer and liver failure will get me right at the point when I've forgotten my own name.  I don't want to live those extra 10 years immobile and pooping (ha ha, I said pooping....) in a bed pan.  I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound like a solid retirement plan for me.

Therefore, if i'm not crapping in your cornflakes, I expect you to stay away from my bowl as well.  This is a major reason why I don't like people pressing their religious beliefs onto others *cough-mormons*.  I don't get up in your grill and tell you that you have to buy the same shoes as me because they are the most comfortable shoes in the world and you will have eternal happiness if you buy these shoes.  I will inform and educate you regarding my shoes IF YOU WISH TO BE INFORMED.  I'm not going to knock on your door, and ask you if you have ever read.......the fuckin.........payless shoes magazine.  I would expect to be glared at, slapped, ridiculed and would probably help you dig a hole to bury me in.  When did it become so unusual to just let people go about their moral business?  I'm hating the direction we're heading and I want to punch whoever's lights out that is causing this to happen.

I'm mad today~

The Bullshitter~ 

Now go buy a shirt HERE........NOW!!!