THE BULLSHITTER

As i've previously mentioned, i'm taking "Scientific and Technical Writing".  I thought I was a decent writer to this point, but as it turns out, I am a HORRIBLE punctuator.  I didn't realize this until my professor explicitly wrote a novel on my last paper about how worthless I was at punctuating.  Therefore, i've decided that if I am that bad at punctuating, then I might as well not worry about spelling either.  I'm sure you've seen this before, but it's really quite cool, so enjoy..................

As it truns out, yuor mnid has the alibity to raed aynthnig taht is mipsleled as lnog as the frsit and lsat lteters are in the rghit odrer.  So for smoe raeosn I fnid it nesecsray to tlel a drity mdae up sroty jsut bcsueae I can, and olny you ralely smrat poelpe wlil be albe to raed it.

Crzay Bkcey,

I uesd to dtae tihs hkooer nmaed Recbeca "Iorn Ctrcoh" Lonis.  I met her at a sahdy ltitle jinot on the oturiskts of twon.  She had a santch taht thorectilaly colud cnotain a flul gorwn troitise.  Of curose we can all aegre taht it ins't sfae to put a trotsioe in yuor imedtiame corchtal rgeoin, but yuor fcousisng on the worng prat of the sorty.  I tlel you me, I touhght taht I had dtaed smoe fearks, but nnoe of tehm hled a cnalde to Crzay Bkcey. 

At frist I ddni't thnik she was too msesed up in the haed....I maen she siad smoe tihngs taht mdae me wnoder at tmies, but I thghout I was jsut benig pranoiad.  Hwoveer, my pranioad spuscions wree bcmoenig a railety.  I smotemies hvae nmighertas if I dirnk cfofee bfoere I go to bed.  So tihs tmie I wkae up and tnhik taht i'm drameing, and I lay trehe and feel smoehting ceerpnig tworad my auns.  Srue eougnh, Crzay Bkcey was atmtepting to isnert smoe frogein ojbcet itno my unrachetd aanl treriotry.  It wuldon't hvae brthereod me as mcuh if she was olny tyirng to use her fngier, but npoe, she was tirnyg to us my fvrtioae nnie iorn.  I maen, who tiers to use a pferctely good tylaor mdae nnie iorn to put up smoeones ass?  Waht a feark!

Nedleses to say I grbabed the culb form her and siad "No!  Bad Crzay Bkcey!  Dno't put nnie ionrs in poepel's raer ends!".  Tehn I flet bad for socdling her and boguht her a bnard new concnuot.  Auctlaly, I bgouht her two concnuots wichh wree mdae of the fniest slciion on the mraket.  She was so ecxtied taht she ran aournd the boclk and hmmeud the satr saplgend banener tehn wnet and buhgot me smoe cohpsitkcs.  I recultnatly aeptcced the cinhese dteah sictks and bgean dmmurnig tpas wthi tehm.  But taht's jsut waht knid of day it was taht day.  Crzay Bkcey saw me aubsing her gfit and strated bkiarng lkie a kteitn and two-setpipng lkie Roy Rgoers.  To my azmemnet her conucots imedmaitley flel off of her cesht and her lcak of top-hvaiesnes cusaed her to flal bckwdaras itno a bwol of jlelo and sofcaftue.  

Ture sroty, and if you dno't bleivee me, jsut ask my firend Jbimo.

Hpoe you enyjoed the raed,

The Bllsittheur

Now go buy a sirht   HHEAWE GFITS