THE BULLSHITTER

So, today I must duel with the topic of "Love", and what that little guy is really all about.........

So I've once again been the victim of circumstance and had my heart removed and substituted it as a "kickball" and had my latest female surgeon kick a homerun....for lack of better words.  At this point in time i'd like to have all of my readers give a simultaneous "AWWWWWWWWWWWWW".  Thank you. 

But we're not here to bitch and moan about my women problems, we are going to rather hit the comic relief side of this nasty little habit we all have called "falling in love".  So i've finally came off of my 5 day bender and am able to throw together some coherent thoughts for you monkeys to read.....I think.  I can't back that one up.

Why does love make us spend ridiculous amounts of money, beat each other up, beat ourselves up, cry like little girls (this one is ok if you are actually a little girl..), and for some of those poor lost souls...actually kill themselves or someone else?  Who is the actual puppetmaster running this sick little circus?  Why do I ask so many open ended questions?  How do you spell chrysanthemum?  What is a question mark for?

Regardless, we sit and dwell on the good stuff when things are bad and we need not do this to our poor selves.  I actually attempted to drink mine away.....I don't advise this, for the fact that unless you keep drinking FOREVER, you are eventually going to wake up hungover and 10 times more depressed about the whole thing.  So, the best remedy is to say "fuck it" and constantly be around good buddies or family members......and a few sexually permiscuous girls does the trick too.  You just have to understand that the bitch was no good, and if your friends have a hair on their ass, they will sit there and tell you how shitty he/her was to you....and they're probably right.  You just have to be sure to not turn into that no-ball pussy loser that some magically transform into during this bullshit.....the one that does anything for him/her while he/she continues to walk all over your world....don't be that guy.

Jealousy is the most worthless emotion on earth, and doesn't deserve a 7 letter name....it should just be called "crap", or some other fecal rendition.  For some reason, human nature permits us to be jealous over just about anything under the sun.  I mean, some of us saps could get jealous over some really stupid shit.  So don't be that guy....or I will find you on the street, and I will punch you in your jealous face.....and I know i'll be able to spot you, because you're probably jealous of my right jab.  Stay away from my jab....it's MINE!!!

That's about enough for today......you want to know about love?  Love's a bitch of a thing that nobody can escape........so buckle up and watch your ass, it's coming for us all and she's gonna kick you around a bit....but if you hold on tight and spur it occasionally, you will smile for the rest of your life.

Have a commendable day,

Soberly yours (finally...sheesh..) 

The Bullshitter~ 

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