THE BULLSHITTER

I felt an overwhelming urge to explain "Eenie meenie miney moe" to all those who do not understand this perplexing tag-inducing tongue twister.....

"Eenie meenie miney moe,

Catch a tigger by the toe,

If he hollers let him go,

Eenie meenie, miney moe."

First off, we need to break this down into its basic quatrain form in order to analyze properly and accurately. 

First sentence:  "Einie meenie miney moe" - This sentence is undoubtedly deeper than one may initially perceive.  First off, what comes to my head when I think of "Einie" is something really small.  Like, for example, your "einie weenie".  In fact, with this alone we could alter and copyright this saying to read "Einie weenie miney mo", but due to the lack of $8000 to get a patent & copyrights, we won't.  Some may say that "einie" is just a bad translation of "any", but oh no friend, YOU ARE WRONG, dick, and i'll explain how sick you actually are for thinking this.  Meenie, would ultimately be referring to any "meanie" but it was originally a hebrew translation from a man named Bartholomeau who had bad breath and a crippled donkey.  The self-explanatory "miney" undoubtedly is referring to the possesive state of the "verbalizer" or reader for you without imaginations.  Next, we have Moe.......moe is a dude that happened to be in the right place at the right time, and thus received his eternal landmark. 

Second sentence:  "Catch a tigger by the toe" - in order to catch a tigger, you most likely would have to be able to find directions to a one "pooh bear" lair.  These instructions have been kept hostage by the CIA for decades due to Pooh's lust for privacy.  You're only other option would be to hideout behind tigger's favorite joint, which is "Lion's, Tiger's and Bear's Oh my", or LTBOM as it's referred to on the streets.  This is his favorite bordello which he frequents, especially in the cold autumnal and winter months.  However, if you get close enough to catch him by the toe, he may not be in the mood for it, due to that "weird half hour" after purchased sex....which leads us directly into the third sentence's meaning.

Third sentence: "If he hollers let him go" - as mentioned previously, he may holler due to his sexual exhaustion, and if I actually have to tell you that if a tiger growls at you, that you should let him go......no wait, better yet, if you asked that, go ahead and hang on as tight as you can.......he'll love it.  And while you're at it, why don't you bite him in his tiger balls too......tigers really love that.  You may be saying, "But mr. bullshitter, tigger is bouncy flouncy trouncy, and fun fun fun fun too!"........hey dipshit, he's still a tiger.  I mean, you can joke around with your loved ones, but if you keep with it, you're going to get your ass chewed eventually. 

Fourth sentence: "Einie meenie miney moe" - once again.....Any mean bastard is mine moe.

So there you go, all you never knew about that little kids saying.

All straight facts....or fiction~

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Have a good day,

The Bullshitter