THE BULLSHITTER

1.  A Time to think:  "Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart" --Anonymous

2.  A Time to Act:  "Open your arms to beautiful moments and they will come to you"

3.  A Time to Pray:  "Lord, thank You for the wise words of others that help me be a better person"

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1.  "Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart"

It makes me warm and fuzzy inside to know that i'm not the only one making up words these days, or adding lengthy words to sound more sophisticated than we really truly absolutely without a doubt are..........for sure.  However, I have heard Mr. Anonymous say some very wise words, therefore, i'll let it slide.  What's with all of the "heart" talk these days?  I just got done ranting about not smiling during heart attacks yesterday....or the day before......or whenever the hell that was.  So we clearly have 2 ways to part with our heart....number 1.  Physically, and 2.  Mentally.  I do believe that physical has been driven into the ground, therefore, i'm going to hit the mental aspects of this one-man circus.

What i'm reading into on this quote, is "Wheresoever" you go to do "whatsoever" you are going there to do, put on your "give it 110%" shoes and give it all ya got!  Man, how corny is this?  So when you sit down to get that root canal next tuesday, be the most positive person you've never been.....which sounds really hard to do....and that's because it is.  The ONLY time this quote is within the boundaries of possibility is if you're going tailgating, or some other recreation venture.  All other accounts make zero sense.  Because when i'm painting my chest, and getting ready to back my favorite college squad (Whom i'll leave nameless, due to the nature of the judgemental bastards of this world), I go full speed ahead, and usually use shallow judgement in making my decisions during this period.  I suppose this is mainly due to the nature of the testosterone/alcohol driven beast within us all.....but it's still the most fun you can have with your clothes on.

Besides recreation though, my laid back nature pretty much forces me to half-ass just about everything else that I do (besides this blog which I tirelessly pursue for you kids).....I believe that it comes with the personality trait of not being a spasastic prude.  So in you prude's cases, you're probably rolling your eyes and thinking that i'm worthless......well, how about we meet in the middle?  I'll sleep with your sister, and you can think whatever you want.  How's that for a deal Mister?  In that case.....I'll go "wheresoever" your house is....with all my heart!

2. "Open your arms to beautiful moments and they will come to you"

For all of you literal thinkers.....I hope to God, that you head out there into the public eye, with your arms wide open.  Then, if I saw you, I would hit you in the chest with ONE BIG BEAUTIFUL MOMENT (ONE BIG BEAUTIFUL MOMENT = BASEBALL BAT).  Man, we would be having fun then wouldn't we?  Anyways, lemme try to relate to this quote before you start punching your computer screen...

Don't be THAT GUY at the bars, who is out there just hugging everything in sight.  Because, even though we know that you are just waiting to hug all the pretty girls.....you usually drink too much, and end up hugging everyone you know.....and you mostly know dudes.  But then again, on the other end of the spectrum, don't be that stuck up cocky prick who thinks he's better than he'll ever be.....find a happy medium.  Else do us all a favor, and just stay home.......seriously.....i'm out of hugs, and I hate assholes.

3.  A Time to Pray:  "Lord, thank You for the wise words of others that help me be a better person"

Especially Mr. Anonymous guy.  He has touched me in places that I never thought would be touched (perverts).  Who did he have to pay to get any quote left unspoken for, to be attributed to him? 

Leave a comment, no matter how bizarre, and we WILL respond in one way or another~

Adios.....The Bullshitter