THE BULLSHITTER

Daily Thoughts:  Provided to you by www.dailyguideposts.com (thanks people)

1.  A Time to think:  "Every Answer asks a more beautiful question"..e e cummings

2.  A Time to Act:  "Remember that all glory comes from daring to begin"

3.  A Time to Pray:  "Dear Father, thank you for the opportunity of this day"

********************* Let the Games Begin! *******************************

1.  A Time to think:  "Every Answer asks a more beautiful question"..e e cummings

(I find it ironic enough that not only to I get my daily snippits from a religious website, but moreover I'm not the least bit religious in any way shape or form.  So if you come here to be revived, I will personally smite you!  Now to begin today's rant.)

Question:  "What is an answer?"

Answer: "This is an answer"

New and more beautiful question: "Why do my feet smell like Taco John's?"

Answer: "Because you stepped on my burrito"

So, I guess we can basically say that the theory listed in 1.) holds true.  There are some beautiful questions that are spawned from completely boring questions.  However, I think what this little phenomena fails to mention, is the equal and opposite effect of this theory can do to a guy.  For example:

Question: "Guess what?"

Answer: "What?"

Question: "Chicken Butt"

Answer: "You're an asshole"

As you can see, we went from our standard question-answer format, to having questions that were answers within themselves.....very confusing.  Who knows what hell could be unleashed with this type of format....I'm guessing that this is how WWII got started......not sure though, don't quote that.

Hitler's Question: "Lovely day out isn't it?"

Churchill's Answer: "What's that?  You're breaking up......this phone is shitty"

Hitler's NEW Question: "You've just pissed me off, i'm going to bomb you"

Don't be that guy that pisses off the other guy by asking a question in an answer box.  Make sure you ask the right questions, because if you become the "i'm going to stick a question in the answer" conversationist, you may be fired.

2.  A Time to Act:  "Remember that all glory comes from daring to begin"

Once again, a double-edged sword.  If you are the optimist, then this statement is humble pie.  But if you're a natural "screw up", then it's more like a one legged man in an asskicking contest for you.  You might be better off, just sitting on the couch, eating a bag of chips and watching everyone else do the "glory starting".  If you were to try, it may be "pandora starting", and something bad is bound to happen.....like a bird flu pandemic, all because you wanted to be Donald Trump's neighbor. 

But, now that I think about it, that sort of makes you a "no-ball pussy loser" if you just sit there and worry about what you're going to screw up next.  So my advice to you, oh "Dante of destruction", is to wait until you find someone who is about to do something huge, exciting and successful, and plant your dagger right in their back.  Find your window of opportunity, and steal an idea or two....that way you won't be a no-ball pussy loser.....at this point, you would be upgraded to "backstabbing copyright infringer".....or something to that extent.....but it beats the latter...

3.  A Time to Pray:  "Dear Father, thank you for the opportunity of this day"

Dear Father, thank you for the opportunity of this day.  You may have not let my day start until 12:09 p.m., which pretty much wasted my morning, but you have given me another grand opportunity to offend and belittle more of your godly creations.......Amen

On behalf of the bullshitter.....have a good day.